Watch Bills & Weight Loss

Good morning ladies!

The weekend is nearly here and there is so much we can do to stay on track. If you’re on a weight loss journey, then keep reading. In fact, this note in particular will cover what I spoke about at my FB Live from Tuesday this week, which you can find here:

THIS IS HOW TO LOSE WEIGHT & KEEP IT OFF ~ Episode #2 ~ Weight Loss for Military Women

When it comes to weight loss or to the watchbill or to your upcoming advancement exam or whatever… what are you feeling about them? What feelings come up when you look at the diet you printed out? .When you can name that feeling, then you can ask yourself what you’re thinking. Your thoughts will always, always, ALWAYS create your feelings. Facts in life never create your feelings. Your thoughts about circumstances do. Every time. So ask yourself what you’re feeling and then you’ll find out what you’re thinking about your diet. .If you're feeling deprived, then why? It's not your diet making you feel that way, it's what you're making the entire diet mean to you…

Posted by Nicole Terwey Coaching on Tuesday, January 8, 2019

I introduce myself a bit more so that you can get to know why I’m doing what I’m doing and my desire for pursuing this work and helping you, my military sisters, with your weight loss efforts. I’ll also talk about why it’s not your diet or anything else that is causing you to feel like you can’t lose the weight.

I got out of the Navy and started this business to help military women lose weight and keep it off so that you would never have to worry about it again, not when you’re standing watch and worrying about other countries wanting to impose chaos and harm on us. Our weight shouldn’t be distracting us from not only our work, but our life outside of work, and our weight and food shouldn’t be a source of stress in our life.

And it doesn’t have to be.

That is what I teach and what I aim to resolve for all of my military sisters. And these women include those who are still in active duty and deployed or at home, those who are in the National Guard/Retired/Reserves (like me) and military spouses because, let’s be honest, you are basically in the military if you’re a spouse – you just don’t wear a uniform or perform your husband’s or wife’s specific job, but you still live the lifestyle.

I’m going to be doing FB Lives every week, mostly on Tuesdays unless I’m physically unable to, and I’ll get into the reason why we’re overeating and what to do about it in the military – on and off duty, when you’re in uniform and when you’re not.

So, why ARE we overweight? We’re overweight because we keep overeating. When we stop overeating and we eat only what our body needs, then our body will go down to its natural weight, which is a lot less than we allow ourselves to think.

Now, my work focuses heavily on the most important piece to weight loss: the mental plan. We never go on a diet until we DECIDE to, which is a choice that came from our brain. In fact, everything in our life has been created because of a choice we’ve made. It really all comes down to the thoughts we have and what we think about the circumstances in our life. And this is where a huge distinction must be made in order for you to understand why it’s not the diet or anyone else that is reason why you’re overweight and where you can gain the power and knowledge you need in order to create what you truly want in life for yourself.

We tend to blame the diet we’re on as the reason we’re overweight or that we’re no longer losing weight. Or, if you’re like me, you blamed the Navy for making you move and making you stand watch and making you drill and making you put on steel toe boots when you’re tired and sore. When I was at PACOM JIOC in Pearl Harbor, I would see the watch bill from when I was standing watch for a year and I was nearly always on watch during a major holiday. I was on a diet then, of course, so I would blame the diet for not being easier because, when I’d get home I would snack on food that was off my nutrition plan because I was so angry that I was going to miss Independence Day with my husband and friends. Don’t forget, this was also the first time my husband were living together, so I was so upset that I was going to miss a holiday with him after we had missed dozens of holidays together before because the majority of our courtship had been apart and long distance. But I was HOME with him now and STILL missing out on fun events like holidays! It just wasn’t fair! Bring on the jar pf peanut butter and a spoon, but a small spoon, I don’t want to go overboard…

I blamed the diet for being too hard to follow and then I blamed the Navy for contributing an unhappy marriage because of my watch schedule. I was gaining weight and I was always feeling out of control because I was trying to control things that I simply could not control. I was soon introduced to Life Coaching and the model I now teach and then my life changed forever. I am much happier now.

The first thing I learned was that there will always be circumstances in my life that I cannot control. Trying to control circumstances is like trying to grab a handful of fire – it’s impossible and you’re left burned and wasting time nursing your wounds back to health. But I kept doing this over and over and, eventually, I foresaw depression in my future because all I could see what me getting burned every time I tried to preempt or control certain things.

A circumstance is something in our life that is simply a fact and completely neutral. Something everyone can agree on and that cannot be changed. I like to tell my clients that the weather is a circumstance in our life. You can’t control the temperature outside. Other people and our past are also circumstances in our life. What someone said, either to you or about you or about themselves, is another circumstance – everyone heard what they said and it’s done.

Our diet, which is that piece of paper we printed out or the email we got from a fitness website or whatever, is simply a piece of information. It’s words that are printed in a list or subjects with different foods listed. The watch bill that I would get every month was also a circumstance in my life. It was just a piece of paper with my name on it under certain days of the week. I would get angry at that watch bill EVERY single time, so I attributed the watch bill (and its coordinator, lol) as a source or pain. Same with the diet I would print out every month – it always left me feeling deprived and unhappy. But it’s never, ever the circumstances in your life that make you feel anything. It’s always, 100% every time, your THOUGHTS about each circumstance that determines how you will feel.

And everything we do in life is based on how we think it’s going to make us feel.

There is science to back this up, not to mention every experience we’ve had growing up that got us to where we are today.

Circumstances, like the weather, are the same for everyone. What each person thinks about the circumstance, however, is where things change. For example, I think the 49 degree weather outside is cold, but to someone else say, from Alaska, they think that temperature is warm. Same temperature, 49 degrees, but our thoughts, or opinions, are different.

My diet, for example, may have been the same for someone else who printed it out, but whereas I thought the diet left me feeling deprived and unhappy, another person could have thought something completely differently. They might have been beyond happy to get chicken, rice and broccoli because they absolutely love chicken. Someone on my watch team would not have felt anger or resentment towards the watch bill because they like having a set schedule no matter what the schedule looks like.

You see, we always have an opinion on the circumstances in our life. And the most important thing to realize is that our thoughts are completely optional. They are our own thoughts and we can think whatever we want. Especially because our thoughts always determine how we will feel. How YOU will feel, not anyone else. We all have our own thoughts that create our own feelings. A thought begins in our brain and a rush of chemicals is created that courses through our body. We experience those chemicals as FEELINGS. That’s how we experience every single moment in our LIFE. When we feel cold because it’s 49 degrees outside, our brain thinks it’s “cold” and all our memories and recognition of what we made cold mean to us in the past course through our body and makes us shiver. Our skin gathers into goosebumps, a rush of cold brushes our scalp, and we grit our teeth. At least, that’s how I feel and experience “cold.”

So, when it comes to weight loss or to the watch bill or to your upcoming advancement exam or whatever… what are you feeling about them? What feelings come up when you look at the diet you printed out? When you can name that feeling, then you can ask yourself what you’re thinking. Your thoughts will always, always, ALWAYS create your feelings. Facts in life never create your feelings. Your thoughts about circumstances do. Every time. So ask yourself what you’re feeling and then you’ll find out what you’re thinking about your diet. If you’re not feeling good because you have negative thoughts about your diet, then ask yourself why. That is such an important question to always ask ourselves. Ask yourself why you’re feeling deprived or angry when you think about your diet. Then, ask yourself how you want to feel. If you want to feel comfortable, content, and satiated, for example, then you can ask yourself that you would have to think in order to feel that way. That’s the secret. Knowing you have the power at any time and at all times to choose how you want to think and, therefore, feel about anything in your life.

I used to feel so deprived from my thoughts about my diet. Deprivation felt so terrible and hollow inside me that I would binge to the point of physical pain in order to “fill” that emptiness I felt. When I realized that I could view my diet as something other than a “fun-killer,” my feelings and actions began to change. I would look at my printed out diet plan and I would ask myself what I really want to think of it instead. Why did I go on this diet in the first place? What can I create for myself if I see this all the way through? How do I want to feel about the changes I want to make?

Ask yourself good questions and remember that you can think anything you want. That is your right as a human being on this planet. You don’t have to stay stuck in recycled thoughts that aren’t getting you the results you want. Change your thoughts so that you’ll feel differently. This will begin to make a huge difference for you when you see how much power you have in your own life.

The focus behind my work is to get you to your natural body weight by eating only what your body needs. But I don’t give you a nutrition or workout plan because you need to know what your body needs specifically. There’s only one way to do that, and that is by eating clean foods and knowing how to work through the emotions and thoughts that come up when you want to eat something that won’t help your weight loss. That’s where I come in. It will never matter what diet you go on if you don’t know how to manage your thoughts and emotions. Learning how to manage your thoughts and emotions now is the way to ensure you don’t diet for the rest of your life. It can be done. You can do anything you set your mind to. You just have to decide and commit and know that you’ll be perfectly OK.

Believe that you can do amazing things for yourself and your weight. I know you can.

~ Nicole

📩 Contact me for more information on:

Weight Loss for Military Women

Life After The Diet

Life Coaching

nicole@nicoleterweycoaching.com

How to Stop Overeating

There are two reasons why we overeat:

Overhunger

Overdesire

In order to stop overeating, then you have to stop eating more than your body needs for fuel.

That’s it.

So how do you know what “food fuel” actually is? And how do you avoid feeling disdainful when you see “food as fuel” and think that you have to remove enjoyment from food? We all have a pretty good idea what kinds of food our body needs in order to keep us alive, help us move well, help us think, eat, breathe, digest, and laugh. We’ve eaten these foods for years – proteins, carbohydrates, fats, vegetables, and chocolate. I’m kidding about chocolate, but for some it might as well be its own food group.

True story: When I was still dating my husband, I used to buy a large Hershey almond bar every weekend I drove to visit him when we were both stationed in Washington State. I thought I “needed” energy to help me finish the drive, and sugar and chocolate would keep me awake. I did this nearly twice a weekend for three weekends every month. No wonder I steadily gained weight over the months and years, among my other stellar food choices that the excitement of dating brings.

Some of these macronutrients (proteins, carbs and fats) have more vitamins, minerals and antioxidants than others, but for the most part, a healthy serving of each of these throughout the day makes our body happy and functioning properly.

But where’s the fun in that? “Functioning properly” doesn’t sound enticing or exciting, especially at weddings, college reunions, family dinners, or a even on a random Thursday night when it’s been a long day at work and ice cream appeals to us as fuel more than some vegetables and protein would.

Overhunger

Eating when you’re hungry is normal. It’s a good sign that your body is running the way it’s supposed to. Eating more than your body needs is where we run into problems. Also, eating less than your body needs is – as in, referring to the extreme in the form of anorexia – can be problematic, but right now I’m discussing eating too much food.

How do you solve for overhunger? Basically, how do you not eat when you’re hungry while trying to lose weight?

#1: You need to have a goal.

#2: You need to have a protocol to follow. A diet plan, a nutrition program, anything that provides you with the nutrients you need in order to reach your goal. You can call it a diet or not, it’s up to you. The most important thing is that it has to be something that you can maintain for life.

Think about it. If you’re trying to lose weight and go on a diet for 8 weeks of eating only sweet potatoes (it’s a real thing, believe it or not), at the end of the 8 weeks, you are not going to maintain the body you worked so hard to get to once you reintroduce other foods into your diet. And you need other food besides sweet potatoes; otherwise your body will become dysfunctional slowly and surely.

#3: You need to stick with it.

Discipline and delayed gratification are part of the process. They are some of the best qualities we can develop when it comes to ANY goal we want to achieve. It can be hard to do when dieting because we need to eat food to survive. You don’t need to finish that college paper no matter how disciplined you are. You really don’t. But applying the discipline and delaying partying with your friends ensured that 1.) The paper was done and 2.) You practiced discipline and learned how to get better at doing hard things.

You also need discipline and a plan when temptations come around the corner and when stresses in life start piling up.

Enter how to solve for Overdesire.

Overdesire

Ultimately, we want to reduce the desire for overeating.

You have a goal and a diet plan. If you follow your program, you will reach your goal.

There is a reason weight loss is called a process. That word does not need to be scary or hard. You are training your body and your brain to eat for function. The body physically understands this and doesn’t care how “tasty” or “delicious” or “soft and moist” a food is. It just needs fuel.

Our brain, on the other hand, is a little harder to train. You have to change the way it USED to think about food while adapting it to a NEW way of viewing food.

Tasty vs. fuel.

Fun vs. fuel.

Grandma’s way vs. fuel

A new way you haven’t practiced before, mind you, so it’s hard to see an end result for something you seem to know nothing about.

You also have to give your brain and body TIME to adapt and change to eating in a way that fulfills your goals. Many, many, many people give up on diets because they don’t see results fast enough. Truth is, they may not have followed their protocol 100% nor did they give their body enough time to physically adjust.

Also, urges and cravings and answering them every time keep us from reaching our goals. The thing is, urges and cravings are feelings – they’re just suggestions to eat. As urgent as they seem, as authoritative as they pretend to be, we don’t have to answer to them.

You know this because you’ve used will power and discipline and delayed gratification before and they’ve worked. But after a while, you cave and give in, and sometimes that submission lasts for a few more days or weeks and, eventually, you’ve completely sabotaged the progress you were making.

Here’s some more truth: NOT giving in to urges is also a process that takes time. It is possible to not answer to an urge, and that is based on what you’re thinking about the urge. Sometimes we overeat as a way of resisting or avoiding it. It’s actually by ALLOWING the urge to pass, allowing the feeling to be felt, where we have the power to make the greatest changes.

A lot of us ignore these feelings and think that it’s our body telling us to eat… That urges are natural, even when spooning almond butter out of the jar seems to be a “normal” way of answering an urge.

Solve for overhunger and overdesire and you’ll reach any goal you set out to reach. Each of these CAN be solved if you’re willing to stay true to the goal you desire to reach.

If you would like to find a way to stay on your food protocol and solve for overdesire and overhunger, then let’s work together and find a way to reach your goal. It is possible, and I can help you get there.

I will teach you the model that will show you how to shape your mind and your body.Email me at ​nicoleterwey@gmail.com and let’s see how we can work together.